Walk away until you're okay

It's normal for a baby to cry, but sometimes a baby crying can feel very frustrating.

If you are feeling frustrated, its okay to put baby in a safe place (like their cot or bassinet) and leave the room. Take a break.

Take some deep breaths. Do something that usually relaxes you, like making a cup of tea.

Check baby, but do not pick them up until you are feeling calm and ready to comfort them.

Call a friend, family member or one of the help lines in our support services section. Don't be embarrassed. It's OK to know when you've reached your limit. Have the name and number of the person you will call when you feel overwhelmed somewhere that is easy to find so that you don't have to spend time looking for it when you need it.

And remember, whatever you do, NEVER EVER SHAKE A BABY as this could cause an injury to baby's brain that could leave a lasting disability or even death.

Share this message with everyone in your household and all of the people who look after your baby, so they can support you and baby and also help keep baby safe.

You can also see our section on dealing with a crying baby for some ideas on how to soothe your baby.

The video below shows a real-life scenario dealing with a crying baby.

 

Taking care of your own wellbeing is important too and will help you to cope better when times are tough.

Some tips from the mothers we talked to included:

"having like a me time... reading a book, uh having a nap, going for a walk or things like that used to help me in order to get my mind together."

 

"Once the kids are down I would go to the gym and just do something for myself. Always at home 24/7 going crazy but having a bit of time whether it's the weekend or just like when the kids are down, having a set routine, being able to do a little bit for yourself um has been good."

Mana Matua has some great information for dads on how to look after yourself and baby.

Whānau āwhina Plunket has some helpful information about looking after yourself as a parent.

Kidshealth has more information on coping with a crying baby.